[Fictionary] ASTEISM results!

[Ziv Stern]

Though they doubted themselves, Elizabeth is our runaway winner (as well as
the only person to guess the correct answer!)

At least one classicist among us correctly recognized the etymology of this
word, from ἄστυ (astu: city)! However, this word’s been on a journey since
then which altogether erased the “city” connection: > ἀστεῖος (asteios:
urbane, polite, witty) > ἀστεϊσμός (asteismos: wit, particularly ironical
self-deprecation, mock-modesty)

The earliest citation in the OED is from Puttenham’s The arte of English
poesie (1589): “Asteismus, or the Merry scoffe, otherwise The ciuill iest.”

General comments:
- Guiding principle for this round, no stars. "Asterism" is a word and this
isn't it.

- Given the several similarities, I wonder if some of our players will be
accused of peeking at each other’s papers? I guess it was a foregone
conclusion that we’d all submit nouns.

 - I am discounting all defs referring to stars, as the word should have
"astr" or "aster" in it. An asterism is a constellation considered as a
pattern of stars rather than a region of sky.

- This is hard. None of the defs has a meaning resembling that of anything

resembling "aste" that I know of, except mine (Greek αστυ, town) and the
stars

(Greek αστηρ, αστρον).

 - Rule 1: I am auto-discounting anything connected with stars.

   Rule 2: I am auto-discounting anything connected with wacky belief
systems.

asteism, n. the belief that we are made of star stuff. Joe

Wasn't that something cooked up by Claude Degler during one of the Numbered
Fandoms?

See Rules 1 and 2.

asteism, n. belief in the wholesome properties of mildew. David

Some people will believe anything. Unfortunately, I still won’t believe
this def.

Rule 1 doesn't come into play but...ick!  Rule 2.

asteism, n. reluctance to examine or confront a complex issue.

Ranjit: 2 + 1 = 3

I work with quite a few people who suffer from this, and I would be
delighted if there is a name for it.

We certainly need a word for this.

asteism, n. polite irony; a genteel and ingenious manner of deriding
another. Wiktionary <https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/asteism>

No points, but a condition to aspire to.

Also plausible.  Also very 'Jim', should derision absolutely be called for,
not that Jim would stoop so low.

asteism, n. belief that humans came from the stars about a million years
ago. Linda

I wonder why the million years is in there? Is there some discontinuity in
the hominid fossil record?

And are bummed because tree-of-life root doesn't grow here.

Rules 1 and 2.

asteism, n. inability to sequence episodic memory correctly, usually
following cerebral trauma. Elizabeth: 1 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 2 for correct
answer = 13

I thought this sounded plausible when I crafted it, but now I am cringing.
This is normal.

Two points. Extra points for breaking off the "a" into "not", which makes
the word seem to have a reasonable shape.

I'm sure there's a word for that.  Why not asteism?  2 points!

asteism, n. a sect of Transylvanian Unitarianism in which meditation is the
primary form of worship. Fran

Scary Buddhists? Scary Friends?

Rule 2.

asteism, n. a lenticular flat-topped elevation in karst topography caused
by an intrusive igneous dike.

Eric: 2 + 2 + 1 + 1 = 6

I can picture what you're talking about, but "asteism" just doesn't have
the right vibes.

I always vote for lentils. 2 points!

I’m a sucker for geology definitions. 2 points.

Goodness.  Intrusive igneous dike sounds very...in your face.  I may have
to use it as an insult in my next Medieval RPG.

asteism, n. a belief popular in the vicinity of Bow Church (London) that
the world was created in five days.

Jean-Joseph: 1 + 1 = 2

One point. Because why should God get a shorter weekend than I do? (I'm
sure the Bow Church part is a clever joke which I don't get.) (I'll give
this my definition-most-likely-to-be-by-Elliott award, as well.)

Five days, huh?  Shaved one off the previous record of six? I like the idea
of a religious belief that's *that* local, why there?  Is ``five days''
Cockney rhyming slang for something like ``a Great Blaze'', i.e., the Big
Bang?  Anyhow, one point for amusement value.

That'd make the believers almost exclusively Cockney in the old and truer
sense of being born within earshot of the bells of Bow Church (these days
it tends to be a label given to any Londoner).  I don't see Cockney folks
buying into that really.  Also, Rule 2.

asteism, n. also called a "sky burial", the practice of allowing a deceased
person's body to be consumed by vultures.

Simon: 1 + 2 = 3

Sky-Clad to Sky Burial: The Stations of a Modern Pagan Life. Random House,
$29.95.

I love the term sky burial, although I think you’d still need to do some
actual burying with the leftover bones…

I learned of sky burial from reading Sandman, and it seems possible that
whoever wrote this did too, so I'll give them 1 point for good taste.

A common practice in ancient ... Persia, I think.  You put the body up in a
high place so that only the birds could get it.  Two points for probably
being the real one.

Pretty sure this is a practice known as jhator.  My memory may be failing
me.   Actually, scratch that, we all know my memory IS failing me...it's
just a question of whether or not the demolition gang got to that bit yet.

asteism, n. in ancient Greece, the government of surrounding towns or
colonies as subordinates of a city-state.

Pierre: 1 = 1

By process of elimination, 1 point

I'm feeling quite peeved at my inability to recall the actual term.
Obviously this is what happens to Classicists when they don't Classic for
sufficiently lengthy periods.  It's not 'asteism' in any case.  At least I
don't think so. I'm now engaging in critical levels of self-doubt.  That
might even make a good definition for Asteism.

asteism, n. a condition of the fingernails, often caused by an iron
deficiency, which presents as a pattern of longitudinal ridges on the nail.

Jim: 1 + 1 = 2

While I believe you're describing a real condition, I don't think "asteism"
would be the word for it

Plausible, but I have this condition and thus have looked it up previously.

*examining his fingernails*  Hmm, do I have asteism?  I don't think I have
an iron deficiency, but there are definitely longitudinal ridges on my
fingernails.  Does this apply to toenails as well?

Bonus (from Elliott):

Here's Edward Gibbon on sky-burial among the Persians:

The disappointment of the philosophers provoked them to overlook the real

virtues of the Persians; and they were scandalized, more deeply perhaps

than became their profession, with the plurality of wives and concubines,

the incestuous marriages, and the custom of exposing dead bodies to the

dogs and vultures, instead of hiding them in the earth, or consuming them

with fire.  (Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, Ch. XL.)

The adoration of fire was introduced into Colchos by the zeal

of the Magi: their intolerant spirit provoked the fervor of a Christian

people; and the prejudice of nature or education was wounded by the

impious practice of exposing the dead bodies of their parents, on the

summit of a lofty tower, to the crows and vultures of the air.  (Decline

and Fall of the Roman Empire, Ch. XLII.)

He doesn't call it asteism because ... what do you know, because asteism

is something completely different!
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